So now that there's a debt ceiling deal, can we finally start being bored to tears by a brand new issue?

There's a deal!

Ending a perilous stalemate, President Barack Obama announced agreement Sunday night with Republican congressional leaders on a compromise to avoid the nation's first-ever financial default. The deal would cut more than $2 trillion from federal spending over a decade.

Greg Sargent says it's a big win for Republicans:

GOP on verge of huge, unprecedented political victory

Anything can happen, but it apppears the GOP is on the verge of pulling off a political victory that may be unprecedented in American history. Republicans may succeed in using the threat of a potential outcome that they themselves acknowledged would lead to national catastrophe as leverage to extract enormous concessions from Democrats, without giving up anything of any significance in return.

Hooray! Now maybe we can see something different at the top of Memeorandum for a change! Y'know, after a few days of parsing and recriminating and speculating on who won or who lost or who's just being a sore loser or really ought to get on board and stop whining that everything isn't perfect.

Me, I'm not even going to bother figuring out what was in the "deal." These things always seem to turn out a lot worse than we thought a month after they happen. More at Memeorandum.

UPDATE - Krugman hates it, so it must be good. The New York Times hates it, too. Doubleplusgood!

I reiterate what I wrote earlier: we don't really know what's in this thing. Plus, all the people noting that promised future spending cuts aren't actually spending cuts at all are absolutely right. We're giving something up front for a promise of something later.

But, again, gotta wait and see.

This Week in Automotivators, July 25-31

Following a week's hiatus, This Week in Automotivators makes its triumphant return! Just click on the link under each picture if you aren't sure what the hell I'm talking about.

First, and most importantly:



The debt ceiling thingie kinda paled in comparison. Which of course leads us to:



Onward:



Link: Da Tech Guy. Picture by Fred Muram.



Link: TrogloPundit.



Link: Instapundit.



Link: The Sundries Shack.



Link: Lonely Conservative.



Link: The Blogprof.

Previously:

• This Week in Automotivators, July 4-10

• This Week in Automotivators, Grandpa Steve Edition

• Make your own automotivators.

Over at Right Wing News today, I overthink this picture:

Or underthink it. There's a lot more metaphors in there, I think:



Read the whole thing.

I guess she'd rathered kiss a Wookiee

Harrison Ford confronts Chewbacca:

See? The stock market isn't doing that bad!

It's all part of the plan:

President Barack Obama takes debt battle to Twitter, loses more than 40,000 followers in one day

That's a little more than 4% 0.4%. In a single day. See? The Dow Jones looks way better by comparison!

More at Hot Air, Malkin, and Legal Insurrection.

UPDATE - I missed a decimal point or something, so my original calculation was wrong. Thanks to Tregonsee for pointing that out.

A four-tenths-of-a-point fall doesn't actually make the Dow Jones look all that good by comparison, but then, maybe that's just the Obama Administration's usual competence showing through. They tried to make the Dow Jones look good, but didn't quite get there.

Wow, the resemblance is uncanny.

I have been shamefully lazy about congratulating m’man Smitty on his new evil minion, Little Smitty, who bears a striking resemblance to dear old Dad:



Seriously, put your hand over the pictures so you can only see them from the eyebrows up. It’s uncanny.

I have been equally shamefully lazy about congratulating Grandpa Steve on his newest evil minion, Grandbaby #6 (so far, Grandpa Steve is well ahead of the rest of us on the evil minion scale). troglopundit.wordpress.com/2011/07/22/congratulations-to-the-trog-and-mr-pterodactyl/

The resemblance here, though, isn’t quite as easy to see:



Unless you cover the entire picture with your hand, at which point the resemblance is again uncanny.

The Adult Diaper Astronaut was still serving as a Naval officer?

Whaddayagotta do to get kicked out of that organization?

ORLANDO, Florida (AP) — A former astronaut banished from NASA after she confronted a romantic rival in a bizarre episode is being expelled from the Navy, officials said Thursday.

Capt. Lisa Nowak will retire with an "other than honorable" discharge and her pay grade will be knocked down one rank, Assistant Secretary of Navy Juan Garcia said in a statement.

You remember her: the nutjob who drove cross-country to kidnap her lover’s girlfriend? That was in February of 2007 - over four years ago. She got kicked out of the astronaut corps, at least, and pleaded the charges against her down to a year’s probation, but was still serving as a Navy Captain until now.

I wonder what it was like to work with her? Did people have to bite back Depends jokes at office birthday parties? Avoid discussing vacation plans that involved long drives?

More importantly, was her duty station one where your peers give you a call sign, and if so...

Nobody tell Mister Pterodactyl

You spend years and years with nary a thought of the now-deceased pedophile cannibal mass murderer from your home state, and then suddenly he makes the news twice in one month:

Man who escaped Jeffrey Dahmer arrested over fight death

MILWAUKEE (Reuters) - A man who narrowly escaped Jeffrey Dahmer and helped end the serial killer's murder and sexual assault spree two decades ago faced a possible homicide charge of his own on Thursday in Wisconsin.

Tracy Edwards, 52 and homeless, was arrested on Tuesday after a fight that led to a man falling into the Milwaukee River and dying. The Milwaukee County District Attorney's office said it was reviewing the evidence with a view to a possible homicide charge.

No cannibalism, body-parts collection, or uncomfortably-textured lampshades were involved, however. As for Edwards' involvement in the Dahmer case:

…Twenty years ago this month, Milwaukee police found Edwards, half naked and partially handcuffed, in the street near Dahmer's apartment. Edwards told police he had just escaped Dahmer's apartment and led them back there.

Police arrested Dahmer that evening after finding body parts in his refrigerator and human remains throughout his apartment.

Too bad that was twenty years ago. If that happened today, Edwards would be the star of his own reality TV show within six months, tops. Sure, the sudden fame and fortune would probably just exacerbate whatever factors cause him to be homeless, but still. I’m sure he could at least swing one date with a Kardashian.

Previously:

• It Was Twenty Years Ago Today, Jeffrey Dahmer’s Dinner Got Away

The creepiest thing you’ll see all day

Alternate headline: this eBay seller’s making a killing!

The story:

An eBay customer has paid almost $1 million to for a Casey Anthony rubber mask.

Described by the seller as “a significant piece of crime history” the mask was purchased with a winning bid of $999,900 last Wednesday, beating another 104 bids, the first started at $25.

The online seller called “prophunter” is based in LA and ended up with six rubber face masks of Anthony’s face that had been used in a parody video and put one of them on sale on eBay.

Have a look:



Are you totally creeped out right now? I am totally creeped out right now.

I get why the masks were made ("parody video," whatever that was), and I get why they’re being sold. But...almost a million dollars? How much could it possibly cost just to create a brand new mask?

There’s two more still available on ebay, by the way. Current bids are $26,000 and slightly less than $5,000. Go nuts.

Is it my birthday? Obama’s approval ratings drop to 40%

Alternate title: stupid RINOs, not approving of President Obama's job performance.

Gallup:

President Obama's job approval rating is at a new low, averaging 40% in July 26-28 Gallup Daily tracking. His prior low rating of 41% occurred several times, the last of which was in April. As recently as June 7, Obama had 50% job approval.

Let’s not get too excited. This could just be an outlier, and anyway his approval rating’s hit 41% a few times and come back from it. Plus, polls suck, so we have to take that into account.

Still. Woot.

This was interesting:

Obama's job approval rating among Democrats is 72%, compared with 34% among independents and 13% among Republicans. In the prior three weeks, his average approval rating was 79% among Democrats, 41% among independents, and 12% among Republicans.

Approval among Democrats: down. Among independents: down. Among Republicans...up? What the hell?

Sure, it’s within the margin of error. On the other hand...don’t count me among those who'll root against the economy to gain partisan advantage, but I do approve of anything the president does to make his re-election less likely.

Your approval of someone’s performance depends on whether he’s achieving what you want him to achieve, doesn’t it? So if you want President Obama to be a one-termer, then don’t you kind of have to approve of his performance so far?

In which case, what’s wrong with the rest of those Republicans?

As of today, I become the answer to the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe, and Everything.

So there.

Trog asked for this

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0iqLhdInGrk&w=560&h=349]

Not in the 'would you please?' way.  More like the 'this is for your own good' way.  You know what I mean.

Who's ready for some football?

Here's why I haven't blogged at all today:

Yep, that's me and Acme Man, whose name I somehow neglected to ask. Nice of him to take the picture with me, though. Saint Vince was there, too. Didn't get one of him.

I felt a little like I was in costume, too: I was the only guy not from the Packers' front office who was wearing a suit. But he, it's a shareholders meeting! What else do you wear?

More blogging tomorrow.

I'm off to the Green Bay Packers' annual shareholders' meeting...

...and what incredible timing, the same week the lockout ended; the same day the players report to camp. I dunno if we'll see any of the players, but, feh. It's Lambeau, surrounded by Packers fans on a beautiful day, with my 11-year-old son who just had to call me from his grandparents' house to make sure I knew that the lockout had ended.

I'll post some pictures later, if I've got any. Seeya!

"Deficits are like smoking: difficult to give up."

"They can be cut only at the cost of genuine hardship, for many people will have become dependent upon them for their livelihood. Hence withdrawal symptoms are likely to be severe; and hardship is always politically hazardous to inflict, even when it is a necessary corrective to previous excess."

~Theodore Dalrymple

For every government action, there is an equal and parallel reaction. Seems like there's a lot of things you could say that about other than just deficits.

Hat tip Ed Driscoll.

We’re here, we’re rich…

...get used to it, bitch!

Public relations, Fishersville-style!

In Single Girl’s News Today:

Gene Simmons and Shannon Tweed. Now that's a match made in heaven.

Gene Simmons proposes to Shannon Tweed on finale of reality show

But wait:

Gene Simmons has finally proposed to longtime girlfriend Shannon Tweed, although it is unclear if she agreed to marry him.

But:

Simmons and Tweed, a 54-year-old former Playboy Playmate and actress, have been together for at least 28 years and have two children - Nick, 22, and Sophie, 18.

Okay, so they haven’t exactly been single lately, either, but:

People reported on Tuesday that Tweed told the magazine in a recent interview that she had moved out of the family's home and that there was a "slim chance" of her reconciling with Simmons.

Tweed said on the season premiere of "Gene Simmons Family Jewels," which aired in June, that she was tired of Simmons' "wandering eye."

Yeah, but:

Also during the finale, Simmons is seen talking to his and Tweed's daughter, Sophie, about his upcoming proposal.

"I've known your mom a while," he says. "We've dated for 28 years. I'm an idiot. I thought maybe it's time she made an honest man out of me. I'm going to ask your mom to marry me. Is that okay with you? Can I marry your mom?"

His daughter replies: "I'm so proud of you."

So. Um. They’ve been “together” 28 years and have two kids, but she’s moved out recently, but the daughter is all in on them getting married, and Simmons popped the question on TV (the absolute most bestest way to propose), but the TV show chose to use her answer as a cliffhanger for next season.

Which means, all you single guys and girls out there, this might mean something. Or it might not.

Huh. It's just like the debt ceiling debate.

Why? Is al-Qaeda handling their finances like we’re handling ours?

Headline:

U.S. officials believe al-Qaeda on brink of collapse

Is their deadline August 2, too? Ish?

Hey, where’s Perry?

He's right here. Right next to you:

Perry pulls into statistical tie with Romney in Gallup poll

If Perry, Sarah Palin, and Rudy Giuliani all get into the race, Perry comes in just two points behind Romney and ahead of Palin and Giuliani, while Michele Bachmann falls to fifth place — well within the margin of error.

Love those hypothetical questions.

If only Perry gets in the race, he starts off five points behind Romney — and five points ahead of Bachmann, who loses four points in the transaction

Romney also loses four points in that “transaction,” while Ron Paul gains two and Herman Cain gains one.

All within the margin of error, of course. Still. Weird.

On the other hand, Harris says:

...among Republicans over one-quarter (28%) say they are not at all sure who they would vote for if they were voting in the Republican primary. Rudy Giuliani (14%) and Mitt Romney (14%) rise to the top among Republicans followed by Sarah Palin (12%). All the other candidates presented are under 10% including Rick Perry (8%), Michele Bachmann (6%), and Ron Paul (5%).

The moral: polls suck. Via Memeorandum.

“GOP in chaos.” They say that like it’s news or something.

The headline:

“GOP in chaos.”

So what else is new?

“The reason Americans do so well in war, is war is chaos, and Americans practice chaos on a daily basis.” ~Erwin Rommel

Politics isn’t war, except metaphorically. War, on the other hand, is the continuation of politics by other means. So. There. If one of America's major political parties is "in chaos," then all is as it should be. In fact, I'd worry more if the GOP wasn't "in chaos."

How come there's no chaos? Why is everybody marching in lock-step!

Whaddaya wanna bet: the Democrats are in “chaos” right now, too. Rather, Senate Democrats are. Oh, sure, so are House Democrats, but that hardly matters.

If the House GOP’s chaos is somehow more visible than the Senate Democrats', that's just due to the larger number of individual Congressmen (“herding cats” is a common and apt metaphor). Also, the MSM’s tendency to amplify “problems” on the GOP side, and the fact that there’s just more full-grown pairs on the GOP side than anywhere else.

It's not surprising, or new, or unique, or especially fascinating. It's Wednesday.

NOTE - the headline I keep referencing is on Memeorandum. The Politico headline is different. I'm guessing it changed at some point.

Misleading Headline of the Day:

The headline:

Sorry, everyone: Scientists prove time travel impossible

No, they didn’t. They only proved that nothing can move faster than light in a vacuum based on what we know today. That doesn’t prove that time travel is “impossible.”

Personally, I’m convinced time travel is possible, but that we will never achieve it. The theory works like this:

• Time travel is invented;

• Somebody travels back through time;

• That person inevitably changes history, whether purposely or not;

• Repeat steps 1 and 2 until…

• History is changed in such a way that time travel is never invented.

According to this theory, there's no state of being other than one in which we'll never, ever achieve time travel. Unless you count putting a few thousand dollars into an investment account and then freezing yourself long enough for it to make you wildly rich, but that's not really "time travel." It's just sleeping for a really long time.

There’s a name for that theory, by the way, but my usual amount (5 minutes) of internet research failed to dig it up for me.

I’ve always thought I’d die in some kind of freak barbeque-related accident.

Headline:

Teen thought he would die in Alaska bear attack

The story:

ANCHORAGE, Alaska (AP) — The teens had been advised to play dead if they encountered a grizzly during their excursion in the Alaska wilderness.

But with the massive, snarling bear suddenly looming over them, 17-year-old Sam Gottsegen of Denver and the other participants of a backcountry survival course did what so many others would have done: They ran.

Lesson one: you don’t have to outrun the bear. You just have to outrun the guy next to you.

The attack Saturday night in the Talkeetna Mountains north of Anchorage came as the group of seven was nearing the end of the 30-day survival course. The teens were at a stage where they could try out their skills without adults around.

Playing dead after seeing a grizzly was part of the training.

Hope they got a tuition refund.

Hey, everybody lived. So I can joke if I want. Speaking of which, maybe they should hire a new professor:

Wisconsin professor wins national Bad Writing Contest

Oh, hell, I write worse sentences than this all the time:

Sue Fondrie of Oshkosh, Wis., won the 2011 Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest for her sentence comparing forgotten memories to dead sparrows, said San Jose State University Prof. Scott Rice. The contestant asks writers to submit the worst possible opening sentences to imaginary novels.

Fondrie wrote: "Cheryl's mind turned like the vanes of a wind-powered turbine, chopping her sparrow-like thoughts into bloody pieces that fell onto a growing pile of forgotten memories."

The University of Wisconsin professor's 26-word sentence is the shortest grand prize winner in the contest's 29-year history, Rice said.

I think this counts for the “Wisconsin Rules the World” category. A win is a win is a win, after all.

Here’s the contest’s website, which honestly looks like they’re gunning for some “bad websites” award or something. Maybe it’s supposed to be metaphorical.

The other 48% were too shocked to answer the question.

Matthew Archbold:

52% Approve of God's Job Performance

Yep, somebody's polling God's approval numbers. Like, y'know, it matters or something. It's like polling George W. Bush's current approval numbers, except Dubya's authority went bye-bye two and a half years ago.

Matthew remarks:

As ridiculous as this is, the good news is that 52% means God stands a pretty good chance of getting reelected, I guess.

Think I'll put up a yard sign anyway, just in case.

I wonder what the favorables are looking like nowadays for Old Scratch. I don't know but I'd bet they're climbing.

Evil never does look the part.

Insty has another pre-Ames GOP poll up…

…with a few more names than the last one. Texas Gov. Rick Perry is way out in front.



Ahead of you, if you're a GOP wannabe right now. That's where.

Note: this still doesn't constitute a TrogloEndorsement.

Previously:

• Hey, where’s Perry? Not on the Ames straw poll, that’s for sure.

UPDATE - Ed Morrissey has more.

What is it about fame and wealth that turn people into such dysfunctional craters of crazy?

Or would they have been dysfunctional craters of crazy anyway? Some people just are, after all:

The mother of "Gossip Girl" actress Leighton Meester is suing the 25-year-old, claiming her daughter beat her with a bottle and refused to send her money she had promised to provide.

The lawsuit says that without the money, she couldn't properly take care of Leighton's younger brother, Alexander, a cancer survivor who recently underwent brain surgery.

But in her own lawsuit, Leighton Meester says her mother has substance abuse problems and that she spent money Leighton sent for Alexander's care on cosmetic procedures.

What the hell? How does Hayden Panettiere handle the fame so well while others turn into ugly that even Jerry Springer would think twice about?

Betcha I could handle the wealth and fame. Oh, what, you don't believe me? Fine, let's test it out. Quick, everybody make linking The Trog your top priority. Praise me, constantly and highly, and let’s get the book and movie rights sold off (TrogloPundit: The Movie, Parts I-VI) so I can get onto the talk/reality show circuit and start dodging paparazzi!

If my own screen test doesn’t pan out, then Jake Gyllenhall will play the title role. I’ll play either a college teaching assistant or a work associate whose only line is “who the hell drank all the coffee again,” or else I’ll cameo several times during the zombie attack scenes.

Yes, technically, that would be illegal in the NFL, but Sportscenter would still run the clip every half hour for a week.

Shutdown Corner:

This isn’t legal in the NFL, but it would be nice if it was

I said I wouldn't celebrate when the lockout was over. I fibbed. Here's a small celebration in the form of a brilliant football catch. It's of the Australian Rules variety, but squint and pretend it's the NFL if you have to and watch Andrew Walker's incredible grab for the Carlton Football Club.

Watch for yourself:

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ERTcZV7uTFU&w=560&h=349]

In the NFL, that’d be offensive pass interference. But seeing as how the refs almost never call offensive pass interference, I fail to see why receiver coaches shouldn’t start teaching that technique immediately.

Hear me, Coach Bennett?

Other Americans unhappy with Obama on foreign affairs, energy policy, health care, border control, and Joe Biden.

Headline:

More Americans unhappy with Obama on economy, jobs

Also, snapshots can be misleading (example), but these hardhats don’t seem all that impressed with President Obama…



…do they?

Shorter New York Times: the only way to pay off current debt is to incur even more debt.

The NY Times opines:

House Republicans have lost sight of the country’s welfare. It’s hard to conclude anything else from their latest actions, including the House speaker’s dismissal of President Obama’s plea for compromise Monday night. They have largely succeeded in their campaign to ransom America’s economy for the biggest spending cuts in a generation. They have warped an exercise in paying off current debt into an argument about future spending.

Maxed out all your credit cards? Can’t afford the monthlies anymore? Don't curtail your lifestyle, just take out another credit card!

Or, hey, maybe there’s a payday lender we could go to. Would a payday lender still take us, do you think?

Memeorandum.

Jimmie Bise can shake it!

The “it” in this case being other bloggers' tip jars. He's got a list of several bloggers in need and he's rattling the tip jar for them, without rattling his own. Except maybe indirectly.

Very selfless of you, Jimmie.

I’m a bit ashamed that I’ve never hit another blogger’s tip jar, even when those bloggers – some of whom I read regularly and consider friends – have been in need.

On the other hand, I’ve never put up my own tip jar, and probably won’t. As awesome as it would be to bring in a little extra income from blogging, I've got a good day job. Others need the tip jar money more than me. If you, reader, have ever been gripped with the irresistable desire to send me ten bucks (or whatever), I urge you to instead send it to this guy, or this one, or this girl, or this one, or maybe this one. Or here. Or maybe here.

So, see, while I’ve never actually hit a tip jar myself, I’ve refrained from competing with those who have tip jars. Just think of it as tips “saved or created.”

Wisconsin soldier invents anti-IED device

Forward Operating Base Pasab, Afghanistan - The Taliban will use just about anything to hide bombs, and a perfect spot is a culvert underneath a road.

Now many of the culverts near this base in Kandahar province are no longer prime bomb-hiding locations, thanks to the ingenuity of a Wisconsin soldier.

Cpl. Eric DeHart, 38, of Birnamwood worked as a senior designer for Wausau Homes before deciding to join the Army for the first time at the age of 36…

An engineer by trade, DeHart began to think about the best way to make culverts safe from roadside bombs, and soon he came up with a solution...

At first DeHart thought about building devices in a few sizes, but he soon learned that although culverts in the U.S. are uniformly sized, that's not the case in Afghanistan, where it seems every culvert is built differently.

Then he hit on a solution.

"If we used a cone, you could shove it in and it can fit anything from 12 inches to 36 inches," said DeHart...

The 428th installed four devices - now called the DeHart Culvert Denial System - and the 101st Airborne placed more than 30 in Kandahar province.

No IEDs have been found in those culverts since they were installed last winter.

I wish the story said something about how many IEDs have been placed in culverts, compared to other places.

Hey, where's Perry? Not on the Ames straw poll, that's for sure.

Instapundit reports:

So, Sarah Palin and Rick Perry aren’t included in the Ames straw poll.

Which, I take it, is kind of a big deal. Romney spent $2 million to win it last time.

But never fear: Insty has his own poll, and he's including Palin in his. Perry, too. Not like last time.

More:

Rick Perry Eyes Late August Campaign Launch

Seems like his campaign has already launched.

Jaw-dropping Headline of the Day

Now this is an awesome headline. Also depressing, but awesomely so.

The headline:

Washington Wants to Avoid Default, but It Can't Without a Plan

Fer cry-eye. Our Mighty Federal Government, the Power Upon Which All Liberal Dreams Rely, the Bureaucracy Chock Full of Pointy-Headed Post-Graduate Degrees, needs a plan to avoid default.

Here, lemme warm up my mostly-useless Bachelor of Arts degree for you: the time to “plan” to “avoid default” is well before default is even an option. It’s called living within your means. Millions upon millions of people - dare I say even billions of people - do it all the time without even the help of a trained accountant.

Maybe we should elect some of those people instead of the ones we have now.

Yes, I know, I said I was sick of the debt ceiling story. Well, I am. This was just too good to pass up.

The Trog comes back, and good things happen: the redundancy that keeps on redunding.

Take it, kid:



Indeed!

Players vote to OK deal to end NFL lockout

WASHINGTON (AP)—Now it can be said with certainty: Get ready for some football!

NFL players voted to OK a final deal Monday, days after the owners approved a tentative agreement, and the sides finally managed to put an end to the 4 1/2 -month lockout, the longest work stoppage in league history.

“This is a long time coming, and football’s back,” NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell said, “and that’s the great news for everybody.”

At a joint appearance outside the NFL Players Association headquarters, Goodell and NFLPA head DeMaurice Smith were flanked by some of the owners and players who were involved in the talks. They spoke shortly after the NFLPA executive board and 32 team reps voted unanimously to approve the terms of a deal.

It would've been fine with me if they'd slashed half the preseason - hey, any delay now just plays into Green Bay's hands. But as long as nothing gets in the way of my football. That's the most important thing.

UPDATE - Via Twitter:

Should I keep going with the new blogging strategy I was trying out before I went on vacation?

Or: ready for some navel gazing?

Previously, my general Rules for Writing went:

• Be original: don’t just write about the same crap as everybody else. Or, if you can’t avoid it, at least don’t write the same damned thing about the same crap as everybody else. Or, if you can’t avoid that, at least don’t write the same damned thing in the same damned way as everybody else.

• Be amusing: people can read boring, clinical crap anywhere.

• Be honest: the easiest way to keep track of what lies you’ve told is not to tell any.

The problem with the first rule being: I was missing out on stories that were generating mucho traffic for others. The Anthony Weiner story, for example. Sometimes, everybody’s writing about the exact same story because everybody’s interested in the exact same story.

Plus, my traffic had kind of hit a ceiling. I wanted to shake things up a little, somehow.

So, I made a pact with myself: I committed to blogging the top three stories on Memeorandum every day, even if I’m not interested in those stories. Thus, Rule #1 became:

• Be original: people can read the same old crap somewhere else. You write some brand new crap.

See, I can make myself interested in any topic. You think I was interested in everything people sent me, back when I used to do Eyes It Willies? Nope. But you find some angle, make it fun. It’s a challenge, see. Like reading Camp of the Saints or Daley Gator when your wife and/or kids are in the same room.

But today presents a new problem. The top stories on Memeorandum today:

• Boring;

• Horrific, but about to become boring if the finger-pointing goes on much longer;

• More boring.

I’m so sick of the debt ceiling. “Crisis.” Dear God. What morons do we have running the country when they can’t figure out how to avoid a financial default without borrowing hundreds of billions of dollars?

I left for a whole week. I wanted this damn thing done by now.

So. There. I found a way to write about it. Happy?

I dozed in my tent during a light rain, dreaming of microwave popcorn.

You probably thought the level of blogging was going to improve from its previous level. But, nope.

Okay, I'm back, and...oh, goody, cannibal pedophile jokes. I knew I could count on you guys.

Thanks to Grandpa Steve and Mister Pterodactyl for filling in while I was gone. Not only cannibal pedophile jokes, but bikini volleyball (the wife can't get mad at me for this one), beer, new guests who do nothing but eat and poop, and a nice little bit of gloating. It was like I never left!

Trog will be back at some point

Today or tomorrow, I'm not sure.  He told me but I wasn't paying attention.

Steve and I have had enough time to clean out the fridge, throw a couple noisy parties and make a bunch of long-distance phone calls while we watched the place.  [Is the "long-distance phone call" completely outdated at this point?  Will the kids get that reference?  Why, when I was your age we didn't have this newfangled "internet" to entertain us, we had to watch something called television!  Remote control?  Hah!  We had to walk all the way across the living room if we wanted to change the channel!  Uphill both ways!!  And we were grateful!!  And MTV did too used to play music videos!!!  Now go get me some tapioca, boy!!]

I don't really look at the traffic stats.  Were they good?  No Instalanche like last year (so far) but really, we don't want to spoil the guy, do we?  He'll expect one every time.

Still, we've learned that Don Surber keeps an eye on this blog.  And where would Surber get his Racine Journal Times news if not here?

And then there's the case of this curious individual.  In putting together a long list of links to conservative/Republican blogs (apparently in response to some guy named "John Hawkins", what an odd name), he went and linked up a pair of decidedly non-political posts (this one and this one) both written by the non-Republican member of your guestblogging team.  Guess which one of us that is.

Truth is, I just about only visit Surber when Instapundit tells me to (there's only so many blog-reading hours in the day, after all), and I never even heard of the other guy.  But I kinda like his style.  Go check it out.  And appreciate the linkage, fellas!  Almost as good as an Instalanche, I'm sure!

UPDATE: Mr. Surber enjoys good puns.  And bad ones, apparently.

Now that's my kinda crazy

The Tough Mudder.  Basically a ten-mile-long obstacle course (see the course here), and being held in Merrimac, Wisconsin this weekend.  Fire, mud, freezing water, electric wires, that kind of thing.  Y'know, I've been looking for some new things to prove how stupid I am.  Go Go Gadget Legs!

But I'm just hearing about it today.  Dammit!  Maybe next year.  It'll be back in Wisconsin in October, 2012.  Should be my kinda weather, and plenty of time to get in shape.  [Sure, just a couple more concussions and you'll be all set.  -Shaddap.]

And the Warrior Dash in Twin Lakes is this September.  That's only 3 miles long.  Could be a good warmup.

Congratulations to The Trog and Mr. Pterodactyl

This morning at 7:45 AM little Mason Leroy Newberg was born. He weighed 7lbs, 14 oz. and was 21" tall. All is well with both mother and child.

We are checking descendancy protocols to determine his detailed position in the family tree. Is Mason a TroglofirstcousinonceremovedTike or a Pterofirstcousinonceremovedactyl?

Introducing my 6th grandchild, Mason Leroy:

 

It Was Twenty Years Ago Today, Jeffrey Dahmer's Dinner Got Away

[Sung to the Beatles' Sgt. Pepper.]

Today is July 22nd, 2011.  Jeffrey Dahmer is dead.  Before that, he was in prison, in the Columbia Correctional Institution in Portage, Wisconsin (which, come to think of it, is right near the Trog's neck of the woods).  And before that...

JD wasn't the fava-beans-and-a-nice-chianti kind of psycho, he was more of a blue collar type.  Still, he had style.  Backyard barbecue at Jeff's place?  You knew the shishkabobs were going to be genuine Bob.  He had a big freezer, too; that meant plenty of ribs, thighs, legs, whatever you want.  Unless you prefer white meat.  Dahmer was a homosexual, so, no breasts.  Sorry.  And seriously, don't ask about the rump roast.

He did make a nice open-face sandwich though.

[What, no jokes about finger food?-Too obvious.  -Even for you?-Shaddap]

Now granted, the man had unusual appetites.  But don't think of him as just a murderer and a cannibal, think of him as a hunter.  A locavore.  Dude was all about the environment.

However, he also had a tendency to play with his food.  And that caught up with him on July 22nd, 1991.  Twenty years ago, today.  His date, on this date, chose to live to date again, and took off into the loving embrace of police protection.  Momma Dahmer told him not to play with his food.  Did he listen?  No.  There's a lesson for all you kids out there, reading this.

Oh, also, if you're going to be picking up strangers in bars, at least sleep with them before you kill and eat them, okay kids?  Doing it in any other order is just gross.

Following his capture and the, um, media feeding frenzy, Dahmer was quickly convicted of 15 counts of murder, out of a possible high score of 17.  He took a shot at the insanity defense and whiffed.  For those 15 counts, he was awarded 15 life sentences, implying that he only had about 74 more days to live anyway because on November 28th, 1994, he was bludgeoned to death by another prisoner.  Early reports claimed it was merely an attempt to tenderize Dahmer; those reports were inaccurate.

JD was born on May 21, 1960, in West Allis, Wisconsin.  Which is right here in my neck of the woods.   Now excuse me, I gotta split.  Writing this post has made me a bit peckish.  Happy July 22nd!

Here We Go!

The Endorsement Deal, part II:

Remember the "beer summit"?

Long story short, an acquaintance of President Obama's got into an altercation with some cops.  When asked about it, the president said something stupid.  Then, in order to mitigate the stupid, he did something just as stupid.  He invited the acquaintance, the cop, and Joe Biden to sit down over a beer.



I say it was stupid because he kept a story alive in which the President of the United States became publicly involved in a local police matter, and not a very serious one.  Don't you have anything better to worry about?

Much fun was made of the participants' choice of beers.  Particularly Obama's.  Bud Light?  He's wealthy, he's the leader of the free world, and he prefers Bud Light.  That cries out for mockery.

But actually, not so much.  I bet Obama just isn't much of a beer drinker.  He is a sports fan though, and if you watch sports on TV in the United States, then you've seen that near-ubiquitous ad campaign - you know, the many many Bud Light commercials, all of which feature the catchphrase "here we go!"

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xeo9mVnuuWo&w=560&h=349]

So, if you aren't into beer, but you watch a lot of sports, what are you gonna say when asked to pick a beer?  The one you've heard about over, and over, and over, right?  Right.  On the other hand...

Obama isn't going to be president forever.  And as ex-presidents go, he's still going to be fairly young.  He'll need an income.  I bet the entire beer summit was part of a long con game (the reporter who asked him about the original incident was probably a plant, even) to get himself an endorsement deal.  So as his first term winds down, watch for Obama to start sprinkling that catchphrase into his speeches.

[caption id="attachment_23321" align="aligncenter" width="450" caption="Too bad I don't know anyone who could Photoshop some beers into this picture."][/caption]

"My fellow Americans, tonight it is my privilege to report to you, on the state of the union.  Here we go!"

You heard it here first.

UPDATE:  Oh yeah, I do know someone who can photoshop some beers in there.

The Kool-Aid guy was a nice touch, I thought.

Well, That Explains a Lot

A new study shows that flag exposure has a subliminal effect on one's character.

A new study claims a single exposure to the American flag -- even among Democratic participants -- shifts support toward Republican beliefs, attitudes and voting behavior.

There are proven ways to combat this insidious effect, however, and it has been mastered by the elite among us:

In many places around the world, they play a game called soccer

 

Last weekend, Japan beat the United States in the women's World Cup final, which is like the world championship of soccer, for chicks.  Hey, no hard feelings, Japan.  Truth is nobody much cares about soccer in this country anyway.

Since then, I've heard a number of people speculating on how to change that - how to make Americans care more about soccer, which after all is a very popular game worldwide.
The problem is that soccer is slow.  The field is huge.  Very little scoring, and too many ties.  How could it attract more fans?

[caption id="attachment_23302" align="aligncenter" width="450" caption="Pictured: popularity"][/caption]

How could a marginal (in this country, anyway) sport capture the attention of American sports fans?



Any ideas?


It can't be that much of a stretch, come on, think.



Politics?  You think politics?  Celebrities?  I dunno.



I'm not getting that.  Look, we need to ... we need to, um, work on our signals.  What was I talking about?



Well I appreciate your enthusiasm, but I don't know.  I'll think about it.  Hate to leave the ladies hanging.  There's gotta be a way.



Some way to build a fan base for soccer in the US.  I got nothing.  Anyone else?

Post Card from TrogloVacationers

The vacationing TrogloPundit sent home a post card with a picture of their scenic campsite:



He also sent along a chart that has been graphing stress levels during this relaxing time:



The Trog and his family will be back this weekend.

I hear radio commercials, and I hate them

In case you are not aware, there has been some political brouhaha here in Wisconsin the last six months or so.  The rest of this post will be written with the assumption that yes, you are aware.

State Senator Alberta Darling is one of the Republicans facing a recall election.  And her district is somewhere around here.  I know these things because of the ads that have been playing on the radio in the morning during my drive to work.

Most of them have been in favor of Darling's Democrat challenger, Sandy Pasch.  When I say 'most of them', I actually mean the same one, over and over.  Here's a youtube of the television version.

800 mil in school cuts to transform your children into losers.  200 mil in tax breaks for people who are richer than you.  Dig?  Yes, it's dishonest and sleazy and cynical, but that's politics.

Just this morning, for the first time, I heard a "pro-Darling" commercial.  I can't find a sample on the Web, so if anyone knows where I can find one, please share.  It will enhance the awesomeness of this post.  The ad accused Pasch (a member of the state legislature, by the way) of voting for massive spending hikes and giving viagra to teachers on the gubbermint's dime, among other things.  And it was the worst political ad ever.

The anti-Darling ad was designed to appeal to the ignorant, the marginally interested, those who don't want to pay attention to politics or who just don't have the time.  The pro-Darling ad was similar in that respect, but was hitting themes and issues that are already years old (Governor Doyle is prominently displayed).  That is not going to have the same effect on the politically lethargic target audience, and it certainly isn't going to counteract the ads being run by Pasch supporters.

It would have been far more effective for Darling to address the same issues as her detractors: how the new collective-bargaining rules are benefitting schools and students, how failing to raise taxes isn't the same as a tax cut, how the budget is helping companies to grow and create jobs.

Does anybody in Darling's office read this blog, by chance?

Illinois Governor Pat Quinn Prepping to Challenge Obama in Dem Primary?

It seems to me as though Illinois' Democrat Governor, Pat Quinn, is amassing Liberal bona fides in order to challenge President Obama in a Democrat presidential primary.

Spin for Quinn:

James Nowlan, a senior fellow at the University of Illinois’ Institute of Government and Public Affairs, said it [Quinn's 2012 budget proposal] reflected the priorities of a man “whose every bone aches to do good for little people.

“Pat just can’t say no to people’s needs,” Nowlan said in a telephone interview. “That’s a part of who he is.”

Quinn's Liberalesque follow through:

Illinois governor Pat Quinn pulled a move reminiscent of Jay Cutler and decided to quit on his bet with Wisconsin governor Scott Walker on the NFC Championship game last year:

Gov. Scott Walker delivered Wisconsin foods to a Kenosha food pantry Monday morning, but noticeably absent was the man who was supposed to be there with him, Illinois Gov. Pat Quinn.

Walker bet on the Packers last winter in their National Football Conference championship game, while Quinn backed their opponents, the Chicago Bears, in the friendly wager.

Because Walker won, Quinn had been supposed to work in a Wisconsin food pantry while wearing a Packers jersey. But after the controversy surrounding Walker’s legislation ending collective bargaining, Quinn hasn’t made a move to head north across the border.

So Walker himself delivered foods from Wisconsin Monday, which included brats, cherry pies, cranberries and honey. He tweeted news about the delivery this morning and Walker spokesman Cullen Werwie confirmed the delivery.

Liberal spin:

Although some may falsely accuse Governor Quinn of welching on a bet, the plain fact is that deep down Pat just doesn't feel that Packer fans rise to the level of 'little people.'

If Pat Quinn can avoid the Illinois Governors' Go Directly to Jail Syndrome, I'd say he has the proper Liberal character to challenge President Obama in next year's primary.

It may be hot as hell in southeastern Wisconsin this week

But at least it's really, really humid.  That's not sweat dripping off me, it's condensation.  Where is Al Gore when we need him?

By the way, you know that 'dew point' you hear people talking about sometimes?  That's not a real thing.  It's something somebody made up to try and sound smart, like 'infield fly rule', 'red hat Linux', or 'Instalanche'.

Now please excuse me, I have to go move my car before the tires melt.

Did you know that Aaron Rodgers has his own music label?

Neither did I.

Here's the company website.  As of this writing, the only content is a link to an equally-sparse Facebook page.

And here's the first band they signed, The Make, from Chico CA (Aaron's hometown).  Their first album is being released tomorrow and for today only - sorry about the late notice - you can listen to it for free.

Finally, here's the single, "Get It".

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cq_rX2EC46U&w=560&h=349]

I'd say Aaron's a lot better at reading defenses than he is at picking musical talent.  Still, it's nice to see that he's keeping busy during the lockout.  Everybody needs a hobby.

And just to be clear, yes; #12 Aaron and I are on a first name basis.

My Body, My Choice

Ho v. Blade

It was a dark and stormy night. After an evening of clubbing, two young hipsters hooked up and retired to his bachelor crib. They couldn’t even make it to the bedroom, but began their wild thang sprawling over the kitchen counters and table. What transpired from there has become the talk of the nation. Paparazzi circled like vultures. Journalists and editors discussed various takes on the story. Tabloid insinuations went to press. Activist groups protested and chanted clever slogans. The Obama Administration breathed a sigh of relief that there was respite from criticism of the President's national deficits, debt, and teleprompted miscues.

With clothes strewn throughout the kitchen, the two beautiful people turned into wanton beasts experimenting with numerous techniques that they had learned from studying Cosmo and online issues of Playboy. Unfortunately for the porn world the frenzy wasn’t videoed.

Just as he was beginning to climax, the young man blurted out the name of the girl’s mother. Surprised, hurt, then incensed, she reached into a nearby drawer, pulled out a carving knife and with one quick slash severed the man’s penis about 2/3 of the way down its shaft while it was still inserted in her va-jay-jay.

After the young woman’s conviction, she continued to appeal. The case was finally heard by the Supreme Court of the United States. Her conviction, in what had been dubbed ‘Ho v. Blade’, was overturned.

For all of us that don’t understand the technical wheretofor/heretofor terminology, the majority decision can be summed in this manner:

Previous courts have ruled that abortion is a woman’s right since it’s ‘her body, her choice.’ Although an embryo/fetus/partially born infant is technically not ‘in’ or a part of her body but is within a complex invaginated sac extending into her pelvis and abdomen, earlier courts have ruled that the contents of this system is under her authority of choice. In Ho v. Blade the same precedent holds sway. The erect penis was within her invagination and therefore subject to her choice. She had a right to sever the invader as a partial birth abortion or removal of a tumor.

Condom manufacturers have begun distributing Kevlar condoms.

Future considerations of SCOTUS:

-“My kid’s bratty throat was between my hands, which are often used like my va-jay-jay, so I abort-choked ‘im.”

-“She was in my personal space, which is part of my body, so I cut the bee-otch and really effed her up.”

-And the Obama Administration’s “We are the chosen ones so the whole United States is part of our body of authority and we chose to abort the contents of their wallets, bank accounts, retirement plans, and any freedoms that they think they had.”

Ripped from yesterday's headlines

...of that major metropolitan paper, the Racine Journal Times:

1)"Ryan raises $3.8M, challenger raises $225,000"

Rob Zerban, the latest sacrificial lamb getting ready to run against House Budget Committee Chairman Paul Ryan, had this to say: "If you are representing big oil, gas companies and insurance companies of course they have a lot of money and are going to support him..."

And we're supposed to really hate those guys.  Hey, I don't use gas or insurance, do you? Get hatin'!

2)"Being redistricted out of their district - Sen. Wirch and two opponents would not live in Senate district under new map"

Bob Wirch (D-Kenosha) could be required to move into the city of Kenosha in order to retain his seat if the new plan goes through.  [UPDATE: the senate approved the plan today.]  As would the two Republicans - Jonathan Steitz and Fred Ekornaas - meeting in next week's primary to Wirch's recall election.  Naturally, Wirch is calling it partisan gerrymandering (take a look at the maps in the article - I wouldn't be surprised if he was right).

Let us once and for all stipulate that: incumbents with important committee posts are always going to raise more campaign money than relatively unknown challengers, and the challengers will always whine about it; and the party that is in the majority will always use that power to secure advantages for itself, and the party in the minority will always cry partisanship.  Someday the situation will be reversed - Dems up, Repubs down - and it'll be the same thing in the other direction.

On the other hand, in this case (these cases) its hard to come up with any sympathy.  Zerban is dragging out the "populist" lament that Obama and Pelosi have been beating to death - those evil fatcat corporations that aren't like you and me at all!  Egads!  And Wirch, while he may (may) have a point this time, wasn't all that eager to represent his district back in February, was he?

This Week in Automotivators

'Cause it's just one of The TrogloPundit's eccentricities. (No links provided 'cause you'd only need one if you have been living in a cave.)




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109 years ago today, something wonderful happened.

In Buffalo, New York, on July 17, 1902, in response to a quality problem experienced at the Sackett-Wilhelms Lithographing & Publishing Company of Brooklyn, Willis Haviland Carrier submitted drawings for what became recognized as the world's first modern air conditioning system.

And God bless 'im for it!

The Wacky World of Intellectual Homo Sapiens

One might think that, since Charles Darwin, Western culture would have abandoned compassion for the weak, the sickly, and the feeble aged among us. Our continued neglect for 'the survival of the fittest' principle has impoverished the human gene pool to such a degree that I suggest the human race has now devolved into Homo sapien inferiorus. This de-evolution has had a 'trickle up' effect so that now even our esteemed intellectual superiors have been tetched.

Dutch intellectuals were paid to count insects slaughtered by automobiles on Dutch roads.

Dutch motorists kill about 133 billion insects a month, splattering bugs on their vehicles and eliminating important members of the food chain, according to a study released this week.

But! as Dr. Whatsisname stated in Jurassic Park, "Life will find a way."

A recent Smithsonian Institution study found that cats caused 79 percent of deaths of juvenile catbirds in the suburbs of Washington, DC. Bad news, since birds are key to protecting ecosystems from the stresses of climate change—a 2010 study found that they save plants from marauding insects that proliferate as the world warms.

New York recently became the sixth state to legalize same sex marriage. The laws of the state of Utah are being challenged regarding polygamy.

Saying the country is at a "critical moment," an attorney for the polygamous family who stars in the reality show "Sister Wives" argued Wednesday that American adults — including Kody Brown and his four wives — have a right to privacy in their intimate relationships.

The French, who are far more civilized than we, have a not-so-obscure law on the books.

A woman in France has married her boyfriend of six years - a year after he died.

Jerry Springer, who apparently is even more civilized than the French, has aired a show titled "I Married a Horse." (You can find it yourself on YouTube.)

Yes, indeed, humans are quite amusing and can provide hours and hours of entertainment. And yet... and yet, I often yearn for the good old days when the Troglodytes and Neanderthals held sway.

What do Ann Althouse, Kenneth Anderson, Ed Driscoll, Megan McArdle, and Michael Totten have in common?

Here's a hint.

Still stumped?  Here's another.  Try to read between the lines on that one.

No?  Okay, I'll tell you.  None of them have ever been invited to guestblog at the Troglopundit.  Suck it, losers!

Chavez Post Surgery Interview

Being of Swiss heritage, we Burris sometimes have the inside track when it comes to reporting news from anti-American countries.

As you are aware, Venezuelan supreme Jefe, Hugo Chavez, has been in and out of Cuba to receive surgery and care for cancer. We were able to score a short post-surgical interview:

TrogloNews: How are you feeling after that very critical surgery?

Tumor: I am feeling muy better. Getting that huge malignancy removed was a great relief and lifesaver.

This is Steve Burri reporting from Havana for TrogloNews.

It's Party Time Here at The TrogloPundit

Fresh blood... new ideas... a definite change of pace...

While the TrogloCat's away...




(Mike brought the funny hats.)

(Pat brought some Sam Adams for those of you not man enough to handle Leinenkugels.)

I awoke early this morning to the most tempting cacophony of smells…

...bacon, garlic eggs, jelly donuts, strong dark coffee. They lifted me from my bed and lured me happily along in the wake of their aroma. Rarely has a fast been broken with such deeply-digested delight and satisfaction.

Of course, once I lifted my head from that engaging and tantalizing repast, I discovered it had been nothing but bait. I was in the family van, and it was moving. By the snickering drifting up from the back seats and the piles of gear blocking the rear window, I knew:

I’d been suckered into another camping trip.

So, if I survive all the fresh air and “quality time,” I’ll see you all next week. In the meantime, please welcome my guest bloggers, Mister Pterodactyl and Grandpa Steve. I’ve very considerately overseen a July Blahs traffic slump of up to 30% on a daily basis the last couple of weeks, just to make it easy for them to show me up while I’m gone.

Of course, last time they guest blogged, Mister Pt. went and landed an Instalanche. So expectations are high.

Kaley Cuoco, on the other hand, is not smarter than me.

Otherwise she'd know there's no such thing as too many Slave Leia costumes:

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t4m6CrBUvWw&w=560&h=349]

Or maybe it's just that "Men Mars, Women Venus" thing. They just don't see things the same way. Hat tip Melissa Clouthier, who's taken to Google+ a lot faster than I have.

"… somewhere out there is a big meteor with all our names on it. How our names got on it, I’ll never know."

Some freak geological occurrence, I guess. A million space-monkeys with a million space-typewriters. That kind of thing.

Mister Pterodactyl. Read the whole thing (that wasn’t the best line).

And, oh, by the way: Mister Pt. will be guest blogging here for the upcoming week while I renew my Adventuresome Outdoorsy Dad status for another year.

What’s the best way to catch a toddler falling from a 10th story window?

I’m gonna go with: before it hits the ground.

Oh, yeah. Sure we recognize you. It’s just you looked a lot smaller when we saw you on TV.

U.S. Recognizes Rebels in Libya

Via Memeorandum.

Keith Hennessey is smarter than me, and after reading his explanation of Mitch McConnell’s debt ceiling proposal, I still don’t like it.

The proposal, that is. I don't like it that Hennessey is smarter than me, either, but whaddayagonnado about that?

Read his whole piece, especially if you’re not entirely clear – as I was not, and may still not be – on the debt ceiling issue.

Here’s what I thought was the most important part:

The debt limit now works as an only if proposition: the debt limit is increased only if Congress votes affirmatively to authorize an increase. Increasing the debt limit therefore requires a majority of the House and Senate to cast a difficult aye vote, plus a Presidential signature. The McConnell proposal would invert this into an unless proposition: the debt limit would automatically be increased unless Congress voted to stop it. And by changing the key vote to a veto override, you would need only 1/3 of either the House or Senate to take a tough vote to allow the debt limit to increase.

In exchange for this significant increase in Presidential authority, the President would take most of the political heat for the debt limit increase, and he would be required to propose difficult spending cuts of an equal or greater amount.

But:

The McConnell proposal does not guarantee that spending will be cut. Congress would consider the debt limit resolution of disapproval and the President’s proposed spending cuts separately.

Which isn’t as good as having them tied directly together, but: at least the president would have to go first. Going first is the politically weaker position, because it gives the other side time to see what people hate most, attack that, and propose something else.

On the other hand, the president would be able to put Congress in the position of not being able to stop the debt limit increase, but not being willing to pass the specific spending cuts he proposed.

Which will lead to more debt, and more spending. Not more debt but less spending.

I don’t like it.

Hat tip Insty.

UPDATE – Larry Kudrow:

The key part of the new McConnell package is a joint committee to review entitlements in a massive deficit-reduction package. Unlike the Bowles-Simpson commission, this committee will be mandated to have a legislative outcome — an actual vote — that will occur early next year … This will be the first time such a study would have an expedited procedure mandated with no amendments permitted.

Larry Kudrow may also be smarter than me, but my first thought at reading that was: oh, good, another study commission. Problem solved!

Also, tax reform could be air-dropped into this committee’s report.

Yes, I'm sure the commission's Democrats will go right along with that.

Raise your hand if you think a study commission divided equally among Democrats and Republicans has any chance – any chance at all – of creating actual entitlement reforms that will protect both current and soon-to-be seniors and current and soon-to-be taxpayers?

Anyone?

Anyone?

Tweet of the Week

David Burge, Iowahawk:



This would have been “Tweet of the Day,” but it was two days old by the time I saw it. Hat tip Tamara K.

Only forty cups of coffee a day?

Well no wonder he got sick. Anybody who can’t handle forty cups of coffee a day...that guy’s going to get sick. No constitutional fortitude. None whatsoever.

And they were probably those stupid little espresso cups, too. The dinky ones.

Wait, you mean forty cups a day is too much? Um. Oh. Never mind, then.

Good Fatherhood

It isn’t all baseballs and implied violence.

Okay, so somebody explain to me how Google+ is better than Facebook.

Instapundit writes:

NOT AGAIN: The End Of Blogging. This time it’s ending because of Google+.

And, yeah, this headline he links seems just a touch overwrought:

Google+ Marks the End of Blogging as a Means of Personal Expression

When Internet-famous people are tearing down their blogs and pointing their domain names at their Google+ streams, is "web logging" dead?

Oh, my. How long has Google+ been around? Couple hours now? And it’s already killing off blogging as we know it!

It’s the most efficient virus ever!

Forgive me if I’m not quite ready to declare Google+ the conqueror of all things internet. I’ve been on it for...oh, about five minutes now. But. I honestly don’t see how it’s any better than Facebook.

The circles? Okay, so that’s nice. Facebook does that, too. Maybe Google+ has a better interface for it. It is pretty slick. If so, betcha Facebook comes up with something else that's slick. If people still don't like it as much, it'll at least partly be because Google+ is the new hotness, and people always like a new hotness.

I’m peripherally aware of some security/privacy concerns with Facebook. Wait two years. The same concerns will pop up in Google+.

In the meantime, Google+ works exactly like Facebook. It looks like Facebook. It does the things Facebook does. It’s really just a slightly different version of Facebook.

Am I wrong?

Half of this headline is a “well, duh” facepalm, the other half…

...oh, hell, I dunno. I can’t get past the first half. Here it is:

Danica Patrick still hot, Dale Earnhardt Jr. slipping in popularity

“Danica still hot.” In other news, sky still blue, and water still wet.

The story is actually about a poll that ranks athletes’ popularity. Danica was third among female athletes for the third year in a row, after coming in first in 2008. Serena and Venus Williams were one and two.

Patrick, the only female driver to win a IndyCar Series race, was fifth in the poll in 2006, second in 2007 and first in 2008. She has ranked third the last three years.

Top five, six years in a row. Not bad. Oh, and yes, Danica...



...you're welcome.

By the way, Danica did make an appearance at the ESPYs yesterday:



She also helped present the Best Team award with…Justin Bieber. So you can see why her popularity is slipping among sports fans.

Scary chart of the day

From the outstandingly named Veronique de Rugy, 43% of every dollar the federal government spends is borrowed:

Today, 43 cents of every dollar spent is borrowed; this amount is about 4 times the rate in 1980. Between 2007 and 2011 alone, the rate has increased 38 cents per dollar. At this pace, the historical trend of deficit spending continues at a distressing rate.

Hat tip Insty. More at Memeorandum. What, you thought I was serious about what I said about Memeorandum in my last post?